Third Wheeling

As Mull, my IEP conversation partner, has yet to email me back, I decided to accompany Caroline McGraw as she met with her partner, Chen, at McAlisters.

It began as awkwardly as you would imagine: Caroline and I at one table, Chen alone at another table on the other side of the restaurant, and no one else in McAlisters. After about 10 minutes had passed, we realized Chen was Chen and we finally joined him. The seating arrangement enhanced my third wheeling, with Caroline and Chen at one two-person table and me, alone, at the table next to them. So that was fun. I felt like this:

As the conversation progressed, however, I felt as though I became less and less of a third wheel, which was nice. By the end, we were a wonderful trio; I had successfully implanted myself into their relationship. Success.

Talking to Chen was fascinating. From China, his life back home is very different than what we can imagine here in the United States. We discussed how he knew no one in China that had siblings, but he had always wanted one himself. He told us how everyone lives in apartments with multiple generations of their family and everyone works (i.e. no stay-at-home moms). Chen talked about how much more approachable people in the US are and how one never chats with someone they don't know.

We also discussed his adaptation to American culture: attending football games, living in Brachman, American food, etc. He told us about the large Chinese community that lives in Arlington and how to find authentic Chinese food. I didn't have the heart to tell him I don't like Asian food, sorry Chen.

Chen was very proficient at English, though a handful of times Caroline and I had to repeat or rephrase what we were saying. He mentioned how English is much easier than Mandarin, one of the most difficult languages to learn. Caroline and I realized how grammatically incorrectly we spoke on a regular basis. The amount of slang we utilize and how quickly we speak was increasingly evident as the date progressed. You don't realize how bad you are at something until you try to teach it to someone...

I learned a lot talking to Chen about the differences between China and the US. It made me feel so lucky to live here, where our families are our choice and you can talk to a stranger on the street. Though Chen is not my real conversation partner and I am anxiously waiting by my laptop for a reply from Mull, I thoroughly enjoyed meeting with him and, who knows, maybe I'll crash their next date, too!